The World's Worst: MAGA's Affirmative Action for The Least Qualified, Most Extreme, And Thoroughly Corrupt Amongst Us

Pete Hegseth, Pam Bondi, RFK Jr, Tulsi Gabbard & Kash Patel reflect the rot, extremism, mediocrity & corruption of their authoritarian leader Donald Trump proving MAGA is fine with affirmative action

Back in the day, I did improv at Bellarmine High School with the Sanguine Humours Improv Comedy Troupe. We used to play a game called “World’s Worst” where you’d step out and imagine the world’s worst dinner party or relationship and deliver some funny quips. Suppose you’d ask us to name the World’s Worst President. In that case, I’d imagine it would be a twice impeached vulgarian and convicted criminal who doesn’t believe in climate change, brags about grabbing women by the pussy, incites a violent insurrection, keeps talking about Hannibal Lecter as if he were a real person, and has been held liable for sexual assault, defamation, and fraud. I wouldn’t have to say all of that. I’d simply yell, “Donald Trump!” and the audience would laugh because they’d immediately recognize him as the punchline.

Fast forward to 2025, and America has decided to voluntarily become an Idiocracy and make our improv game into reality. The first convicted criminal and only person to refuse to lose an election is set to take the oath as Commander-in-Chief in less than a week. This is a person whom the DOJ would have most likely convicted and sent to jail if not for the fact that a plurality of Americans refused to elect Kamala Harris, a competent, educated Black Indian American woman. Instead, they went for the guy who repeatedly quotes Hitler.

Well, they F’d around and we’re all about to find out that the rot starts at the top and corrupts and contaminates the entirety of the GOP, right-wing media, and corporations who are all bending the knee to an aspiring authoritarian. As California, the most populous state in the nation is suffering from its worst fires ever, Trump is busy promoting disinformation, conspiracy theories, cruelty, and sharing AI-generated images of “Trump Was Right” replacing the Hollywood sign atop burning hills.

I say all this as a preface to the current Senate Confirmation Hearings over Pete Hegseth, Pam Bondi, and other dangerous clowns who will assemble as Trump’s Luca Brasi hitmen to abuse their positions to attack his enemies and undermine U.S. security and the Constitution. Why are any of us surprised or shocked by these choices considering the vulgarian who is nominating them?

Republican Senator Joni Ernst, a survivor of sexual assault, will now vote for Pete Hegseth as Secretary of Defense despite him being thoroughly unqualified for the job and being credibly accused of sexual assault, alcoholism, and financial impropriety. To put it in perspective, the current Secretary of Defense, Gen. Austin, a Black man, is a 4-star general. Hegseth is a Fox News host who bragged about not washing his hands for 10 years and whose former colleague in the National Guard reported him as a potential “insider threat” due to the numerous tattoos on his body that are often associated with white Christian supremacists. (Hegseth’s book was titled American Crusade in which he said he was too extreme for the U.S. military.) Please tell me more about your distaste of Affirmative Action, MAGA, as you elevate the most mediocre white men on Earth and lower the standards to the point where you can slither over it.

Ernst even refused to meet Hegseth’s sexual assault accuser who can’t speak publicly due to an NDA she signed. (If Hegseth has nothing to hide, perhaps he should release her from the NDA, right?) But Republicans, like Rep. Nancy Mace, another survivor, are fine with sexual abusers as long they’re part of the MAGA agenda to own the libs and attack the most marginalized, especially trans people who make up less than 1% of the population. That’s why they turned a blind eye to Christine Blasey Ford and her credible allegations of assault at the hands of Supreme Court Justice Kavanaugh. Why let a little sexual assault get in the way of undoing Roe v. Wade and eliminating women’s rights?

Speaking of sexual abuse, assault, and rape, Trump’s pal Jeffrey Epstein was allegedly protected in Florida when Pam Bondi was the state’s Attorney General. Bondi also got a nice $25K donation from Trump University and, surprisingly, declined to investigate allegations of fraud committed by the for-profit university. (Trump University later settled for $25 million with victims of its fraud.) Bondi is also an election denier who was part and parcel of Trump’s failed attempt to overthrow our free and fair 2020 election. Oh, and she was a lobbyist whose clients included Amazon, which probably explains why The Washington Post, owned by Jeff Bezos, has tries its best to sanewash her career.

I still haven’t talked about vaccine-skeptic RFK Jr leading the HHS despite having brain worms and zero qualifications during a time when polio and measles are making a comeback. There’s unqualified MAGA Reek Kash Patel as head of the FBI, a position he said he’ll use to attack Trump’s political and media critics. Oh, there’s Russian stooge Tulsi Gabbard as the Director of National Intelligence where she’ll probably promote Russia’s talking points and Putin’s national security agenda. Meanwhile, Trump is seeking to purge the National Security Council of anyone who isn’t deemed loyal enough to him. Meanwhile, these MAGA nominees dare to say they won’t “play politics” in their roles.

If you believe that, then you’ll believe Mexico will pay for a border wall and Trump’s tariffs will help the working class. Speaking of the worst, we also have to endure right-wing apparatchiks in the media responsible for putting lipstick on pigs and promoting misinformation all to prove their fealty to Donald Trump.

As a masochist, I went on Piers Morgan earlier today and debated Trump’s cabinet with Piers Morgan. Michael Knowles, and Dave Rubin, who was paid by Tenet Media that the DOJ is currently investigating as a front of Russia. With a straight face, they defend the indefensible, reject climate change, celebrate the Crusade, and generally side with the “World’s Worst” takes as a matter of pride.

Tragically, this isn’t an improv game. This is reality. This is the United States of America under Trump and right-wing extremists. This is the world’s worst.